You were days or weeks away from your divorce being finalized when, BAAM!—the Coronavirus hit. Now, you’re desperately trying to be socially distant from your soon-to be ex and if that isn’t another level of stress, well I don’t know what is. The courts are rescheduling cases and you were so close (or at least things were finally moving). You may be distraught and feeling doomed, wondering how you will possibly cope.

 

You’ve made it this far, with some more hope and, a positive outlook and some seriously smart coping tools – YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS!

I created a list of self-care tools that you can use while being stuck inside.

1. Turn to Facebook & Social Media Divorce Support Groups

Whether you’re quarantined with kids or alone, try some of these online communities:

• Kate Anthony, Should I Stay or Should I Go
• Journey Beyond Divorce
• Town–based divorce support groups, as well as general divorce support.
• You may also find that former in-person Meetup groups may form online social media groups in place of social gatherings during this Coronavirus outbreak.

2. Use Skype, FaceTime, Video Conferencing or Group Chat

Don’t let yourself wallow in your misery and make things worse. Use this as an opportunity to reach out to loved ones via the many digital tools we have today, like

• Skype
• Zoom
• Google Hangouts
• FaceTime
• Group Chats

You can even create your own friend or family Facebook group! Don’t be afraid to reach out. Chances are, many of your loved ones are needing support as well, whether they’re happily married or not.

3. Make Online Meditation & Mindfulness Activities a Focus

It is easy to drown in the negativity and start to feel panicked.

To keep your mind as positive and as “stress-free” as possible, try meditation, exercise and mindfulness apps or sites. Use headphones to stay on track if needed while using these tools.

• Insight Timer, Calm and Mindfulness are excellent apps to track and assist with meditation and mindfulness.
• Movement is good for the soul and body! Exercise helps flood your brain with feel-good hormones, so whether it’s taking a walk or run outside, or doing an in-home workout, it will be worth it. PopSugar Fitness shares excellent printable workouts, as well as links to videos and fitness gurus for great at-home workouts, as well.

Try to do this daily. If you have kids at home, it’s easier said than done—so just do your best. Remember—any movement is a good thing! You can even include kids in on the fun.

4. Read a Book (Or Listen)

Drown your sorrows and cares away in some juicy, fluffy chick lit or erotica to distract yourself from the daily doldrums. Fantasy and mystery novels are also great escapes.

• If you prefer a “hand-off approach,” try Audible (offering 3 free books right now) to listen to books, or Overdrive/Libby.

5. Write it Out

• Grab any old notebook or test out WordPress to journal or blog away your feelings.

Chances are, not only will you feel better getting out your thoughts on (digital) paper, but you may also find that by writing things out, you’re less likely to snap and fight with your spouse during this stressful period of lockdown.

• Try blogging, you may find some new virtual “friends” who also relate and empathize with your plight.

6. Post Inspirational Messages

• Grab some post-its and place inspirational messages and quotes around the house.Things like, “Anything is possible,” or “This too shall pass” could be little reminders in your bathroom or in your home office to inspire you to buck up and hang in there!

7. Envision Your Life with a Vision Board

This quarantine situation (and your marriage) will be over. It’s not a matter of if, but when? Instead of feeling discouraged and angry, be happy knowing that your future will be here before you know it and it will be so much brighter than it is today.

• Create a vision board that captures exactly what you want your life to be, post-divorce and post- Coronavirus. Place pictures of love, money, career goals—whatever you want your future to be. By doing this, you are already making your future life, a happy life.

While this current situation is not easy or enviable, things will get better. Your divorce will happen and you will grow from this.